Saturday, May 12, 2007

Sunday Scribblings: Second Chance

I’ve walked through life not second guessing where I’ve ended up. I’ve tried not to beat myself up over decisions made or roads taken or not taken. There’s nothing I can do about what’s already been done. To spend time pondering “what if” seems to be time ill spent. For the sake of the prompt, I was going to use said “sick time” to go through my mind and find things I’d change.

But then it occurred to me that I’m already living a second chance. And I’m so grateful for it.

I had been in the Bay Area about 10 years, and most of that time I had been with one man. We worked hard, traveling around the country for various utility companies, doing consulting work, and living a very comfortable life. For the most part, there was plenty of work, which meant plenty of money, which meant a nice house, nice clothes, nice vacations, nice things. We were building a
gorgeous house in Tahoe Vista, a beautiful home we were going to live in full-time. It was a magnificent life.

In the end, though, it wasn’t the life for me. That realization came to me New Year’s Eve eve 1995, when a red-light running, uninsured, truck-driving dumb-ass crashed into me. And shook my life up big time. Because that near-death experience made me wake up and look around and realize that I wanted a different life, a better life for me.

Flash forward more than 11 years. I’ve been with Pete the entire time. We’ve got plenty of things, that’s for sure. But they are things the three kids have left around the house – the latest Happy Meal toys, pencils used as drumsticks, half-empty bowls of snacks, Marvel hero shoes, Volcom sweatshirts, pool towels. It’s a comfortable life, all right, but it’s a different kind of comfort. And I’m grateful I got the chance to experience it.

[I’ve posted about regrets and the domino effect of what happens if you change just one thing you regret in your life and how your whole life changes. Most recently I wrote about it in late
February, if you’re interested.]

[Today’s post was written in response to a
Sunday Scribblings prompt. Do head over and see how others tackled the prompt.]

11 comments:

Mel said...

Patois, it seems to me that you made a good trade. A good trade indeed. :)
(Although that house! Wowy wow wow.)

Crafty Green Poet said...

Glad you feel you made the right choice!

Sian said...

I agree with you that what ifs are a waste of time, but assessment is always worthwhile if you do it with your level of clarity

Regina Clare Jane said...

Sometimes it takes something huge for us to see what is and what is not important in our lives...
I am glad you were able to get this second chance...

jennifer said...

I love this SS, It is actually very much like my life.
We have done some trades in our life, some trading up and some down to ensure our happiness and well being. It took my mom's death to really bring it home for me..

Wishing you well...

DJPare said...

Wow - happy you're around to write about it!
You never want to have a near-death experience, but nice to see that it changed things in such a positive way for you.

myrtle beach whale said...

But with all that money you could have bought a car with better side impact crash test results. Seriously, glad you are still around to enjoy your family.

colleen said...

The picture really says it all!

Jennifer/The Word Cellar said...

What a blessing to have the life that fits who you are! (...and now i'm going to slink off in a corner and get my priorities straight after lusting for that house...)

gautami tripathy said...

Nothing can be greater gift than gift of life a second time. Sometimes it makes other things seem so small. Rightfully so.

Rosemarie said...

It seems like you've made the right choice for you and your family.

Be blessed knowing that God had whispered and you heard!

"Pearls of wisdom...a heavenly voice."
http://avoicetobeheard.blogspot.com/

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