Monday, June 18, 2007

Harold be Thy Name

Another Sunday, another children's service at noon at church. Our church pastor is on a three-month sabbatical, so we have our assistant pastor in charge for the whole summer. She's a different animal than Fr. Phil, that's for sure. While she goes through many of the same children's service rituals as Fr. Phil created, she puts her own stamp on some.

Fr. Phil, lenient gent that he is in nearly everything else, has this thing about not letting the kids touch the felt board characters. He's in charge, thank you. The stern Mother Susan goes overboard in the opposite direction, having the kids pick out the characters they want to hold before she starts the story, and then having them place them on the felt board as she requests them. "Who's got a man?" "Who's got children?" "Where's Jesus? Who has Jesus? We need Jesus!"

Fr. Phil has created what we believe to be the only church which allows seconds at communion. Yes, seconds. And, no, it's clearly not wafers because who would want seconds of those? It's pita bread. And the kids clamor for seconds. Thirds! Every week they do this. But Mother Susan doesn't believe in "Jesus seconds," so she wouldn't let the kids get sated on Christ. Instead, she put it back on the altar and said, "I'll feed it to the birds." And I wonder, does that mean the birds will be saved?

Yesterday, we are all in the prayer circle, holding hands and talking to God. "Thank you for fathers." "Thank you for sunshine." "Thank you for everything." As we're about to start the Lord's Prayer -- singing it, mind you, not chanting it -- a little voice pipes up with, "Ashes, ashes, we all fall down." Cue laughter.

It's my kind of church.

[The title? You know what mondegreens are, right? Some folks hear the Lord's Prayer beginning as, "Our father who art in heaven, Harold be Thy name." More mondegreens at wikipedia.]


jenica said...

didn't jesus let the 5000 eat until they were filled? i'm sure they didn't just give it all to the birds. ;-D

love the ashes, ashes!

The Owners said...

What is your denomination? Pita bread? I've only had the flavorless wafers.

Your title reminds me of a joke my husband emailed to me last week. It was called "Kids In Church". Pretty funny.

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