The last few days, I've had bouts of envy which shot out of nowhere. Nobody needs to tell me I lead a charmed life. I certainly know I do. I've been incredibly lucky, and I remain incredibly lucky. When I say my prayers, I often wonder why God would listen to me. "Is that her again," He'd think? (As if he didn't know.) "Doesn't she see all the misery in the world? Doesn't she see that she's better off than 99% of My people?"
Human beings being human beings, that need to compare ourselves to each other is fairly strong. And, like God tells me all the time, I am better off than 99% of the world's inhabitants. What's more, if a comparison is going to be made, it needs to be done in its entirety. No picking and choosing allowed.
Sure, that woman had three kids and looks great in a bathing suit, but her mother is in the throes of dying, she has no relationship with her sister, and her oldest child is on a one-way track to juvenile hall.
And that lady over there, the one with the very, very expensive house and the brand new Mercedes and the horse? She's never been able to have children, she and her husband have always wanted children, and her husband has just fallen in love with a much younger woman who, you got it, will be having his child four months from now.
How about that guy, the one with the three published novels. Did you know that he's actually on heavy medication for depression, that he has attempted suicide in the past, and that he might prove successful one of these days?
Can I at least envy my husband, then? The one who can cook up a delicious meal with little forethought and the same ingredients on hand that I face everyday? Can I at least envy him, Lord? "Sure, go ahead, but, remember, he has to go to work everyday while you get to stay home with the kids." Okay, God, ask me at the end of the day if he's got it better than me.
[The title of the post today? Yeah, it's a light shade of green. Check it out at wikipedia.]
[Photo originally from the Muppets site.]