Thursday, August 2, 2007

Damn That Beepin' Alarm!

It's always something in our house. "Something" that prevents the adults from getting a good night's sleep.

Pete scored some drugs last night. Yeah, that's right, he got the hard stuff. Not enough pseudophederine to open his own meth lab, of course, but enough to help with his sinus issues. [I don't know if I've mentioned before the problems with being able to get the "real" Sudafed. I know I've confessed to "dealing" the real stuff
out. Looks like I've got another post coming on the feds and phed.]

So, Pete's doped up, and I suggest he also take a downer to counter the high of the other stuff. [Yes, you caught me, the "downer" in question is Tylenol PM. We're not really doing illicit drugs here. Move along.]

Lights out. Daughter is asleep. Youngest has fallen asleep. Eldest is awake and worried about the giant spider coming in to get him. [Again, another post on that. My, my, my! My life is full of posts. I should be a fence. Bada-bing, bada-bang.]

Husband is asleep. I am falling asleep. All is quiet in the BEEP! WTF? BEEP! I am up and searching for the rude smoke alarm with the dying battery. Pete gets up, too, naturally. BEEP! Oh, it's that one, the one outside our bedroom.

Pete stomps to get the ladder from outside, brings it back, takes the offending cover off, pulls the battery out, hands me the battery, takes the ladder back outside, and returns to bed.

Very quickly, the house has returned to BEEP! WTF? BEEP! Son-of-a-bitch smoke alarm is the kind that wants a battery and will keep on beeping 'til it is satisfied. Sadly, I have already checked and seen that there is no replacement battery to be had, and I can't remember which of the 523 battery-operated toys my spoiled rotten children own has the right type of battery.

Pete stomps to get the ladder from outside, brings it back, rips the freakin' alarm off the ceiling, hands it to me, takes the ladder back outside, and returns to bed.

That should do it, right? Now, we can go back to BEEP!

Guess where the alarm spent the night? That's right, outside in the locked Jeep. Gee, I hope the BEEPing didn't wake any neighbors. As for Pete and me? Our bedroom is so far away from the Jeep, we couldn't care less.


jenica said...


i can't tell you how many nights our house has gone without the *insurance* of having a smoke alarm...

Jone said...

I can totally relate!! I have tagged you here:

Anonymous said...

Oh that beeping would drive me nuts! Mine goes off everytime I blowdry my hair...very annoying.

Jillie Bean (AKA Bubba's Sis) said...

That EXACT scenario has happened at our house!! Why do they always do that in the middle of the night?!?


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