Monday, August 27, 2007

Good-bye Poop!

Whenever I take the mutton chops down to the field – which is almost always twice a day – I typically bring a lovely bag of poop home with me. Lovely! And for the longest time, I’ve thought of Margaret Wise Brown’s Goodnight Moon as I say in the proper cadence, “And a bag full of poop.”

Time to exorcise that from my head and place it onto the Internet’s. My bedtime story, updated for the ages.

In the great big field
There was a metal backstop
And a gopher hole
And a referee–
Yelling out, “Si, that’s a goal!”
And there were three little lads playing with dads
And two of my offspring
And a ball to fling
And a lawn mower rut
And a young mutt
And a rag and a scoop and a bag full of poop
And a grumbling old lady saying, “Not still more poop!”

Good-bye field
Good-bye goal
Good-bye ref yelling “That’s a goal!”
Good-bye mud
And the gopher hole
Good-bye lads
Good-bye dads
Good-bye offspring
Good-bye ball to fling
Good-bye drool
Good-bye school
Good-bye mower rut
And good-bye mutt
Good-bye rag
And good-bye scoop
Good-bye nobody
Good-bye poop
And good-bye to the lady saying “Not more poop!”
Good-bye grass
Good-bye air
Good-bye doggies everywhere

[Major apologies to Margaret Wise Brown.]

6 comments:

Mike M said...

ROTFLMAO

Anna&Sophie said...

Too cute!!!!

bmxmom said...

Cute :)

jenica said...

i'm hearting this. and i'm hearting even more that you apologize to the original author. hehe

JerseyGirl said...

I can't believe he threw up at school. Thanks for the postings about things not to do when he grows up. This were good ones. That poem had too much poop for me.

Jolene said...

I think I like this one better than the original. I think the kids would like it better too. Anything with poop referenced is a sure hit.

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