1. I do not frequently laugh out loud when reading blogs. (And, frankly, I don’t think I’ve ever used LOL.) But this one from Just Paisley is a keeper. Do read it. Now. I’ll wait.
2. I want to be as funny as Paisley is. Alas, I’ll have to settle for inspiring eye rolling or a slight “heh” from you all.
3. And lest you think I am the only funny one in my family, my husband said he knows what he’s going to make our next house out of: the “wood” in the fast-start firelighters we buy. Yeah, ‘cause they never work.
4. Oh, you think he is the only funny one in the family, eh?
5. Well how about the youngest, then, upon discovering that he had curled noodles rather than straight ones, that the bread was garlic rather than plain, that he was given apple juice rather than milk, and that the noodles had visible parmesan on them? “Wow!” he said. “You guys are doing a lot of wrong things tonight.”
6. So we sent him to his room.
7. No, we didn’t. We laughed, and then I wandered over to the computer to write it down.
8. Am I the only one who communicates via mail so infrequently as to have no street addresses for friends and family?
9. An email address just won’t hack it when you’re sending out traditional Christmas cards.
10. I love this time of the year. I am beside myself with feelings of joy, peace, and happiness. And that’s not just because I’ve finished my Christmas shopping. I can look at the ornaments on my tree and remember where many of them came from. Look, that’s the manger my parents bought for one of their first Christmases in the late 1950s. Look, that’s one I got when I was a teenager. Look, friends sent us White House ornaments each year. And those three? The kids’ first ornaments. The funny thing is, I can’t blame my sentimentality about Christmas on my kids. I’ve always been this way. You can ask my mom. Well, that is, if she’s still talking about me after the porn shop fiasco mentioned in last week’s issue.