Friday, May 30, 2008

Vacuous Vacuuming

My house is not pristine. Not by a long shot. There is clutter in many places. Dust finds itself at home on the built-in shelves throughout the house. There is, of course, the matter of my three children. One is quite neat, but that's only because he no longer plays with small toys. Daughter contains her toy explosion to her own room. Youngest considers himself the king; therefore, the house is his castle, and a castle must be filled with whatever brings the king amusement at any given time in any given room.

There is one thing I do quite often, and that is vacuum. (Yeah, that and laundry and dishes and...you get the picture.) Take our wooded lot, add a dog who sheds to beat the band, mix in kids whose lax mother lets them eat wherever, and you get messy floors. Four or more times a week, I'm vacuuming with my big ole clunky Dirt Devil. It's a heavy sucker. (Ha ha ha: a "sucker.") I've been moaning to Pete about getting an Oreck as soon as our next ship comes in.

We were once an Oreck family. [Damn, why do I feel like I'm a recovering something-or-other?] But we I wore it out to the point where it was being repaired a couple of times a year, leaving me without my soothing vacuuming activity for a week or two at a time. So we got the big ole sucker several years ago. It weighs a ton. It's unwieldy. It's a chore to use.

Enter my wonderful mother, AKA my ship, who heard me pining after my old Oreck. She got a deal on one -- half price! -- and sent me a new one. It's a combination Pete's birthday present/my birthday present/our anniversary present. Hell, as far as I'm concerned, it can wipe out any gift she'd send any of us for a year.

Because it's fantastic. I can vacuum easily everyday. And I have been. E-v-e-r-y-d-a-y. Because it's so easy. And calming. And light. And fast. And perfect in every way.

Perhaps it's time to mention to my mother that our next purchase is a Prius, you know, when our ship comes in.

Rides to Heaven on a Gyroscope

A couple of months ago, I saw a client I hadn't seen for a number of months. Like more than a dozen people have in the recent past, she ...