Monday, September 29, 2008

Fill in the Missing Word

Poor Youngest. For years, I've told him to use his words rather than his fists. But oh, Lord, what words he is a' usin'! Why, when I was a lad, I'd have had my mouth washed out with soap if I'd said what he says. And that would have been after my daddy had broken a yardstick on me. [Okay, for the record, he didn't break a yardstick on me. He broke it on my brother. And, honestly, yardsticks are pretty damn flimsy. Now, the belt? That was sturdy.]


Back to Youngest and his glibness. All he really wants is to be in control. Go figure that the rest of us won't cede an inch. [Or a foot. Or a yard...stick.] Daughter and her friend were not paying enough attention to his direction. He pleaded. He screamed. They went about doing it their way.


"You jackholes!" he calls them.


I shout down, "Don't you use that word."


"Hey, at least I didn't use the 'A' word."


Later, it occurs to me that he could almost get away with using it if he went with the story that he didn't use the "R" word. [Not the forbidden "R" word, people. "Rabbit."]


And so another day filled with random outbursts and varying degrees of slipping sanity begins.

9 comments:

Mayberry said...

Is it wrong to be a little impressed that he even knows the word "jackhole," and that perhaps it could substitute for some other word?

Skyelarke said...

love that invention: "slipping sanity"

CP said...

Um, what's the forbidden "R" word? I'm drawing a complete blank! (I KNOW I'll look foolish when you answer but oh well).

Tara R. said...

yeah, I'm drawing a blank on tghe dreaded 'R' word too. I did have to laugh a little at 'jackhole,' I may have to use that one on the drive home.

Maria said...

I worry all the time that Liv will start swearing because of me. I try and try to keep my terrible mouth under control but I tend to say "shit" way too often.

Liv just looks daggers at me and I end up apologizing...

Beck said...

It's mouth warshin' out time! Or something. My kids are still at the Lecture When They Hear Swearwords stage, which I hope lasts all their lives. That'll make 'em popular.

D... said...

LOL! I can laugh because I have been battling this problem for YEARS. Just when I think I have it nipped in the bud, he comes up with another one.

Wracking my brain trying to figure out the forbidden "R" word. Am I naive?

Tricia said...

I kind of like "jackhole". I don't think I've ever heard that one.

My four year old actually said, "Yo Dude" to me the other day. I'm wondering if I already have to start checking for girls and beer hidden in his room.

MamaGeek @ Works For Us said...

Slipping Sanity just OUGHT to be a blog name.

I still can't swear in front of my parents without turning 32 shades of red.

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