Monday, October 6, 2008

Does This Make Me Look Fat?

Land Shark! Oh, Wait, No, it's Just a Salmon
I don't know what tickles me about this picture I found in the Marin Independent Journal the other day. Perhaps it's the identifier "in costume." You mean he isn't a giant salmon swimming out of water? [Yeah, yeah, I get the reasoning. I just found it funny.]


3 comments:

Bubba's Sis said...

Shut up! That's a COSTUME?

D... said...

LOL! I'm glad they identified him. For a minute there I thought he was the real deal.

G. Savant said...

I think it looks like a humpback whale with an eye infection.

By the way, I once took part in a Native American cultural celebration (Alright, fine, THEY called it a 'Pow-Wow'.) up near the California/Oregon border. It was held in a large banquet hall next to the ocean and many of the local Native Americans were invited, and a salmon buffet dinner was being served. I was in line for food with a Pomo friend of mine and I asked him what kind of salmon they were serving, thinking he might know because he was from the area.

"Oh, you should really be asking Uncle a question like that," he said. "I don't really know..."

"Oh, yes? Where's Uncle?" I asked.

An older man turned around who was further up in the buffet line. "I am Uncle," said the man. He had long silver and black hair that was braided and had beads in it, and he was wearing a tanned-leather vest, a beaded headband with a crow's feather sticking out of it (seriously), and jeans: just a perfect picture of proud Native American heritage, and obviously a respected elder dressed to the nines.

"Uncle," I said in my most respectful tone of voice, "can you please tell me what kind of salmon this is?"

"Oh," he said slowly and with immense gravitas, "this is my absolute favorite kind of salmon."

"Oh, yes?"

"Yes," he deadpanned. "Free."

The whole buffet line broke into laughter. I don't know why I set myself up for those kinds of jokes.

Rides to Heaven on a Gyroscope

A couple of months ago, I saw a client I hadn't seen for a number of months. Like more than a dozen people have in the recent past, she ...