1. Do not ever believe the scheduling person when she tells you that the MRI on your elbow is "easy as pie."
2. Instead, believe the technician who administers MRIs when she tells you that procedure is "the most painful and difficult one to do."
3. Are ear buds plastic? And can we extend the cords all the way out of the MRI machine so that we can listen to, I don't know, Bruce Springsteen for the 47 minutes we're having the MRI done?
4. Have the manufacturers of MRIs ever considered having someone like, I don't know, Def Leppard, perform along with the sounds generated by the MRI so I can be deafened in a good way rather than a BAM-BAM-BAM-BAMBAMBAMBAM way?
5. Am I giving away good ideas that I should have patented in some primitive way before mentioning it to my three readers? (Hi, Joanne! Hey, Dana! Yo, Jenica!)
6. Memo to all: When you're asked to write down your email address, cursive might not be the best choice to use.
7. That is, unless you don't want to receive the middle school's weekly newsletter.
8. Regarding email addresses, might I suggest you set up a fairly "formal" email that automatically forwards to your regularly used one. Do you really want the school to send notes about your child's bad behavior to "Mamilicious" or "CrazyLee"?
9. Yeah, even though I swore not that long ago that I would not volunteer to help in any more lame-ass endeavors unless I was completely and utterly in charge, I am now doing the weekly email newsletter for Eldest's middle school.
10. I can offer only this in my defense: I said I'd do a six-week hitch as the editor close to a year ago. Time does really fly, eh?