1. Nothing makes me appreciate my children's relative fastidiousness more than when I am exposed to other children's lack of said trait.
2. Me and mine (all five of us) shared a bathroom with the 11-year-old son of our hostess. I don't know if it's a lack of aim he possesses or if it's intentional, but I felt the need to clean the toilet multiple occasions over the course of our four days there.
3. And while we're talking toilet habits, let me point out that this same boy has a flatulence problem worse than my own mutton-head after she devours a block (or two) of cheese.
4. It was so bad at one point that only Eldest was willing to be in the same room as the other boy. Everyone else had fled to colder and higher ground to escape.
5. Again, I'm not sure if it's intentional or not.
6. Sadly, he and his brother are the children on the sideline of a bitter, bitter divorce which is approaching the one-year mark.
7. Having been on the sideline of such an adventure, my heart breaks for the kids. Oh, sure, as I tell their mom all the time, I feel really horrible for her. And I do. Truly.
8. But the kids in this? The ones who are supposed to get to remain innocent for as long as possible? The ones we hold as newborns and swear we'll protect forever? The ones we look at throughout their lives and feel our hearts burst with feelings we think can't possibly be sustained at that level but are? Damn.
9. And just so I don't end on such a heart-breaking note, let's go totally off-topic thought here. If I'm willing to cheat at bingo at the kid's school parties -- and I'm not really admitting I cheat -- how unethical would it be to cheat at my first blog giveaway?
10. Yeah, that's kind of what I thought.