Sunday, February 14, 2010

Ethics Optional

Dear Patois,

Your application for health coverage has been evaluated.

We're sorry to inform you that your application has been declined based on information in your medical record.

If the basis for our underwriting decision is not explained in this letter, you will shortly receive a detailed explanation in a separate mailing.

*          *          *

Pete, of course, got his denial down and dirty very quickly. Mine dragged on for weeks. I never really expected Blue Shield Motherfuckers of California to actually give me insurance, mind you. But there was this little part of me that held out hope.

Was it the slightly elevated cholesterol numbers that I started taking medication for a year ago? Or was it the hyperthyroidism that leaves me taking an unpronounceable medication for, quite likely, the rest of my life? Or maybe it's the arm pain that I've stopped getting any treatment for because, hello, I'm trying to get some insurance here? Or is it the fact that my father died of melanoma in 1987 at the ripe old age of 56? That I've had three kids? That I'm a brunette? That I broke my arm on the jungle gym when I was 7? That I'm aging? That I might actually need health care?

Blue Shield Motherfuckers of California: may all your deaths be drawn out, horribly painful and devoid of all dignity.

So, my existing policy -- the one that they have to give me by law -- expires February 28. Can anyone think of any unnecessary procedures I can undergo before then?

Or would that be unethical?

*          *          *

I remember a couple of court cases which accused some heavy metal bands of contributing to some teens committing suicide or killing someone else. I've noticed that when I listen to a handful of Springsteen songs, the lyrics underscore my anger, my rage, my desire for harm to befall those in the health insurance industry. To extract some kind of vengeance for the evils they do.

Do you think I can quote those as a defense? You know, just in case?




[Find some ethical folks at Sunday Scribblings today.]

[Ethics dictate that I acknowledge that the above lyrics are by Bruce Springsteen. They come from Johnny 99 and The Promised Land. Anyone who knows me knows I am an adoring fan of Springsteen's. The only bumper sticker a car of mine has ever had was SPRINGSTEEN bold and true on my '69 Mustang. His songs speak to me. But, no, they never tell me to kill. That's just my Twinkie defense.]

8 comments:

Tara R. said...

The company my hubs works for was bought by another company and our insurance is changing over to BC/BS... now I'm worried. My family, esp. The Boy and me, are walking pharmacies. Is there any appeal process, any thing you all can do?

Lilibeth said...

As long as men seethe in anger at injustice there will be ethics. The whole cost of health care in this country is unethical...

but I know what you mean. I pay $700 a month for insurance and have a $7,000 deductible. I am seldom sick and have no Pre-existing conditions. Basically, I have no insurance...and I'm paying half of my take-home salary so I can say that I do. That, too, is unethical.

Catherine Denton said...

I'm so sorry about the non-coverage. That's horrible. But you had me laughing. My favorite line: "Can anyone think of any unnecessary procedures I can undergo before then?"

And yes, I think you could use lyrics from Springsteen as your defense. But I'm no lawyer...
Winged Writer

simplicity said...

Oh man! That stinks. Wish I could think of a whole bunch of things you could make them pay for in the next 2 weeks. Go into the clinic EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. for random misc. reasons! Hilarious (though time consuming!)

b said...

don't you just want to scream???? maybe we can get coverage for everyone someday. i am so sorry.

b

Janet said...

Insurance is the biggest scam in America today. We are very lucky in that my husband runs his non-profit and his board offers health insurance for all the employees and families. To insure 20 employees and families costs the company $375,000 a year. The Mountain Man spends a large portion of his time writing grants just to cover the health insurance, or trying to find cheaper health insurance, instead of helping poor people get houses, which is what the business is supposed to be about. Insurance companies are the people who are screwing up the health care reform.

Dee Martin said...

Hubby has been through dialysis, peritonitis, and kidney transplant. I've had my own health issues. I am probably the last person that should complain because we have certainly reaped the benefits of health insurance. That being said, insurance is the new money changers in the temple. If Jesus came back today - guess who's tables he would be turning over. It is a horrible mess and yes, my insurance costs me nearly half of what I make every month and yet, we could not survive without it. It's an expensive addiction that is cured by nothing except death.
Prayers that you find some kind of coverage that won't force you to give up something minor say, electricity or supper or one of your kids....

CrAzY Working Mom said...

We're the same. Hubby was turned down by three different agencies. Too many reasons to count. The baby who has had RSV and several ear infections could be covered for a 110% raise in premium with an exclusion for anything related to those two things for at least one year, with review after that...so, umm...yeah, babies get ear infections and snotty noses and coughs. So, if I'm paying you 110% extra and you're not even going to cover her for most of what she'll need, what's the point?! I don't get it??!! We'll just put the $800 a month you want into a savings account and have it if we have to go to a doctor. *sigh*

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